So that happened…

Bearded Ladies and Drunks in Bars

As far as I can tell, there are three undeniable truths in life.

  1. Kids are stupid.
  2. Boys smell bad.
  3. Weird things happen when you sit near the restroom in bars.

Here’s a tale to exemplify Point 3.

George and I were out recently, minding our bees wax and drinking a beer at a neighborhood establishment when a fellow imbiber stumbled toward the ladies room. Sure that was not the spot he wanted, George hollered after him: “Hey, that’s the ladies’.”

The fully bearded human turned around to respond, “I am a woman,” and then entered the ladies room.

We sat in astonished silence for a minute, and then commenced drinking.

Soon enough, Beardy McClearlyaman emerged from the restroom and meandered over to our table.

“A hole’s a hole, right?” he said.

“Just keep walking,” George responded.

“But I wasn’t walking,” Beardy said, clearly baffled.

“Then please do,” I piped up.

The guy stood there, confused and staring, then laughed, “Oh, right,” and stumbled off.

I swear to God this happened.

I don’t even want to talk about the guy who kicked the door open and shouted, still standing in the bar, “It’s shittin’ time, fellas!”

Although maybe that was like a public service announcement, I don’t know.

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